Hate Me Lyrics - Blue October
I have to block out thoughts of you, so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape, to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, and a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you, will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me, just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me, it is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
I'm sober now for 3 whole months, it's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so f*cking far away that I'll never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
'Till I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling, "Make it go away," just make a smile
Come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered, "How can you do this to me?"
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see whats good for you.
For You x3
The first time I heard about this song, it was back when I was going through alcohol problems during my University years. I used to watch the song's video over and over. I just loved the way the song was sung on that video. Then I lent the CD to my brother and never saw it again. And I forgot how much the Hate me lyrics were genius, until...
Some months back, we decided to use a spare laptop at work as a jukebox. And someone added the Foiled album by Blue October. Then I heard the song again and it totally blew me. I started to listen to the song over and over. I started to sing the Hate me lyrics in my car, in the shower, at night. So I said, these lyrics can't go unread. I had to talk about it. I had to tell what it was all about. Read on, because here goes the lyrics analysis of Hate me by Blue October.
To me this song narrates how Justin Furstenfeld (Blue October singer) has alcohol/drug problems and how the only one helping him out is his mother. Okay don't go "Aww it's so sweeeet", because its not. The worst thing about having alcohol/drug problems is when your parents start to help you out. Funny I know, but that's how it goes.
I have to block out thoughts of you, so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape, to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, and a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you, will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me, just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me, it is I that wanted space
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape, to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, and a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you, will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me, just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me, it is I that wanted space
The first verse narrates how Justin feels guilty about his mother helping him out. It's a thought that's constantly in his head. It crawls in him. Like eating him inside. He describes this as "a burning in my pride, and a nervous bleeding in my brain". This part of the Hate me lyrics is simply genius. This is an exact description of the state of mind of anyone in that situation. Then he starts to tell how his mother kind of became distant, because he asked for it.
The chorus of the song is brilliantly sung. You can feel all the anger and sadness in the screams. I love this guy's voice.
I'm sober now for 3 whole months, it's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so f*cking far away that I'll never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so f*cking far away that I'll never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Sounds like Justin is feeling guilty. He'll never fall into alcohol/drugs again, because that's what tore him and his mother apart. He also narrates in a beautiful way how his mother always kept helping him. Even when he did not deserve it. Mothers are like that. They are strong and they'll do anything for their kids. Justin has mixed thoughts. He wants to get away from his mother, but does not want her to suffer. He came to a point where he feels he does not deserve to be cared for by his mother. But then again, he can't just disappear, he can't do that to his mother.
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
'Till I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling, "Make it go away," just make a smile
Come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered, "How can you do this to me?"
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
'Till I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling, "Make it go away," just make a smile
Come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered, "How can you do this to me?"
Then there's the post chorus. This part is really like the climax of the song. The part where the author goes all out. And says all that is on his mind. He's clearly frustrated. "Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made", that's one thing we all did when we were frustrated. He also tells how his mother over pampered him, so that he was never a man. Then comes the saddest part of the Hate me lyrics. The part where he sees his mother crying. That's when he became a man. That's when he realised all his mistakes. But it was too late. Because he can't make her smile come back. He can't bring her back to life.
So he says "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you, hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow, hate me so you can finally see what's good for you". He feels so guilty because all this time his mother was helping him get out of addiction, he did not realise how the time they had was priceless.
Now you have two options:
- Listen to the song on the Blue October official site or on Blue October' myspace page
- Buy the song from the links below
I really love this song. I feel kind of heartbroken every time I listen to it and I know how much you love it, for having listened to it so many times with you in Jazzie. It's amazing how much the singer opens up in this song by talking about his drug problems and his mother especially. It's one of a rare kind of song and it really touches people. Haven't we all felt that we've failed our parents at some point in time?
Yes its rare to have singers open up about their real problems. It sure feels good to open up about our problems.
"Haven't we all felt that we've failed our parents at some point in time?"Yes. It is sad. But we can make up to it, don't you think?
It's strange how songs can effect people. For me, it wasn't a struggle with drugs or alcohol, but coming to terms with what I did and saw in OEF! (PTSD) And pushing away/losing the most wonderful woman in my life, because I thought she was better off without me. Now that I'm sober(what I call getting help)I see that was wrong. But both our lives have gone on. I just wanted the best for her.
Yeah songs affect us all D. What happened to you is sad, but as they say there's light at the end of the tunnel.
Sorry about the PTSD. It must have been really hard, man. Hope it's going better for you now.
Keep well!
Dude, I really don't think it's about his mother.
Lines like...
"The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again"
and
"And then she whispered, How can you do this to me?"
...don't feel like they're tailored for mum.
You got some good points Anonymous, but if you listen closely to the intro of the song, you can hear someone saying "Hi Justin, this is your mother...".
That speaks for itself, right?
Think the song was meant for a girlfriend/wife. It makes more sense now that I've listened to it closely. With stuff like "...for all the things I didn't do for you". And overall the kind of attitude that the woman is supposed to have reflects more that of a girlfriend than that of a mom.
But then in the video there's that bit about the mom leaving a message on the machine. Guess they wanted to orient the song differently for the video. It would have been more awesome with a lovely girlfriend in my opinion. :u
Fuck fact: In my version of this song the part where the singer says "fucking" has been zapped out.
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